MEN UNITE!!! The Age of the Amazon is Upon Us!

August 24, 2010

“These boots are made for walking, and that’s just what they’ll do; One of these days these boots are gonna walk all over you…”
                         -Nancy Sinatra

In 50 years women will rule the world. I first noticed this disturbing trend while teaching one of my honors classes. As I looked around during a debate all I could really see was soft skin, big bright eyes, and hair flowing from all angles of the room. Each side took their stance and began their arguments with poise and grace; the pitch of their voices rose higher and higher as the debate raged on. Pastels and perfume crowded my senses. The sugar and spice estrogen in the room was so thick, my head started to spin. 

“Where are all the boys?” I wondered. I had completely lost track of the debate. I didn’t know which side was winning; I didn’t care. All I could think about was why wasn’t I hearing nary an adam’s apple among all this talking? Of course there were a few males bedecked about the room; but none of them seemed to have an interest, much less an opinion, about whatever human issue was the focus on this unit’s debate. Were they silent because there was so few of them? And why were there so few males in an honors class anyway? Upon closer inspection, I found that not only were there less males in my honors classes, but the majority of the females outperformed every one of them. In each class the top student was a female every time, and she was usually ahead of the males by a significant number of points. I raised my concerns in the faculty lunch room and found the trend was happening in all subject areas!

We have generations of history that proves men are intellectually superior to women, so this can’t be an issue of man lacking the ability to rise to the occasion. I had to discover what the cause of this mental impotence could be. I interviewed several of my male students and the conclusive evidence is as simple as it is disturbing. They were just lazy: “But Mr. Richardson, I don’t feel like doing that much work!”  “But why should I worry about it? My mommy does everything for me anyway!” “But I don’t have time to do any work! I have to play Madden and World of Warcraft!” These young men were adamant that their time was somehow used wisely and they shrugged me off as some old curmudgeon who was outdated and antiquated. Women who are dissatisfied with their male bosses taking credit for their ideas, and their male coworkers making more money for less work need not be frustrated much longer. They need only wait for this generation of VPs and CEOs to retire or die.  There will be few males, if any, competent enough to take their places.

Who is to blame in this disturbing trend of male incompetence? Obviously not men! The feminists have taken the feminine out of female, and as a result men are left emasculated. What started as liberation has become full blown revolution! It started subtle, but women have slowly been taking over for decades now. It began with an infiltration of the universities. While most men were out doing physical labor and fighting in wars, women slowly began to over-populate the institutions that shape the next generation of world leaders. I remember an incident in the 90s on the campus of University of Delaware when I ignorantly committed a heinous crime against women. I was exiting a dormitory and I held the door open for the person behind me. She grabbed it out of my hands and snapped, “What? You think I’m too weak to push open a door?!” She muttered expletives as she walked away. I was dumbfounded. I was frozen in speech and in step. Women have crossed the line of gaining equality with men to becoming exactly the same as men in everyway. Think of Angelina Jolie. The truth is, girls that kick ass are sexy. Guys line up in droves to see this female action hero of the new millennium, but gentlemen, what are you going to do when your woman is able to kick your fat couch-potato-ass? Are you ready to be the mansel in distress? Are you ready to be dominated and tied to all four corners of the bed? Perhaps I’m overreacting: Only men watch those movies anyway, you’re probably thinking, chick still just dig chick flicks! Not so anymore. Take a break from the Xbox 360, and flip through the cable listings. Look at the Lifetime Channel: “Television for women, by women.” The sappy chick flicks are steadily being replaced by Resident Evil and similar movies with a heroine that is as hard and bad ass as any man ever was. Take a look at the content of the popular series, Sex in the City. If you could stop paying attention to Kim Katrell’s boobs for a minute you will see that these chicks are just men without penises. They live out every male’s fantasy as they move from lover to lover without consequence. No more girls crying at the bedside, they are the one’s sneaking out in the middle of the night these days. No more worries about inconvenient babies in the age of easy access abortion! But what if she wants a baby? Consider Jennifer Aniston’s new movie, The Switch.  What’s the point of getting a man involved in the first place? Kids don’t really need a dad anyway. They just sit around, drink beer, watch sports, play video games, and search online porn (What? It’s not cheating, if there’s no physical contact, right?). Gentlemen, how did we get to this point? It is not an easy pill to swallow, but I may have the answer.

Consider this: Single Moms and Sugar-Ma-Mas. Gentlemen, while you thought you have been riding the gravy train, the fact of the matter is that women have gotten used to living without your help. Single Moms have had to learn to cope and survive without any help from “dad.” They have found out they can have successful careers, and even though daycare is raising their children, it’s better than dealing with some inconsistent bum who doesn’t show any of them any affection anyway, or worse, spends his time abusing the ones he supposedly loves. But some guys still know how to “treat” their women. They got game where it counts and they make their women feel like natural women for at least 10 minutes at time. They take pride in all the Sugar-Ma-Mas they acquire. More and more these men are becoming dependant on their Sugar-Ma-Mas. These young boys spend all day smoking weed and playing Call of Duty instead of discovering their own call and stepping up to their own duties. They think they live the thug life, but they wouldn’t survive without the naïve and generous resources of their multiple female partners. The truth is, men, you simply aren’t needed anymore. What is the result of this disturbing trend? If nothing is done to turn the tide, I predict that within one to two generations the male species will be reduced to slaves and pets whose only real value will be for grunt labor, physical pleasure, and sperm donation to keep the earth populated.  

But gentlemen, before you punch a hole in the wall, or lose yourself in a stupor of alcohol, or begin to passively aggressively ignore your partner, fear not! I have a solution! I have spent much time observing the situation and there is only one course of action that can be taken. Women have spent the last half century learning to how to fill the manly roles you abandoned, but they still have one fatal weakness. They still are not immune to emotion. Men, the secret is simple. Talk to them. Ask them how they feel, and really listen to the answer. Women will let you into their deepest darkest secrets if they sense they can trust you. But to listen, you must be present. Tell your homies you gotta go. Get off the streets, stop dealing drugs and get a real job. Show your woman you can be relied on. Turn off you Xbox and do your homework. Begin to work your way back into the universities. Learn the pride and self-respect of accomplishment. Learn the art of Chivalry again; regain your strength and manhood. Use it to protect her and not to abuse her; open up the door for her and pull out her chair. She secretly loves it, but fears giving you that kind of power. Show her you can be trusted with power by being man enough to share that power in equality: Be vulnerable with her. Show her you will love, honor and respect her for who she is and not just use her for what she can give. Take back the children you spawned and be a father to them. Teach them to be responsible adults. Teach your sons how to respect themselves and how to respect women. Teach them how to love a woman and not just use her for a cheap orgasm. Teach your daughters how to love and respect their future men. It is a simple task: just be a man that your daughter can love and respect. Show her how she should expect to be treated by her man through the way you treat her mother.

Gentlemen, with these simple steps we can turn back the tide and restore balance to the universe. Only you can accomplish this deed! Only you can make the difference! Only you can make the change! The only way is to be there for your children so you can influence them the right way. The only thing that should stand between you and your child is death. Think about it. A day where every child has a father and a mother who loves him and teaches him how to give instead of take. Every child living in security knowing that both parents who conceived her have her back and will encourage her to reach her fullest potential. It is possible, but only if today’s men step up.  

“It seems to me that it is men more than women who today have to become knights and honorable. If enough honorable men stand up, that’ll be a quiet revolution. That’ll produce stable families and stable children who will take over the world.”  -Peter Kreeft, http://www.worldmag.com/articles/16886

Peter L Richardson
8/16/10

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14 Responses to “MEN UNITE!!! The Age of the Amazon is Upon Us!”

  1. Steph Says:

    Dude, I sure hope comments like “We have generations of history that proves men are intellectually superior to women…” are satire. And what’s with ranting and raving?

  2. Danielle Says:

    HEY STEPH! IRON MY SHIRT!

    • onegirl4god Says:

      I don’t know who you are Danielle, but that was uncalled for. And, I know Pete pretty well, so I can ask hard questions of him.

  3. Jessica Says:

    yes, I am wondering the same thing as steph…why does intellectual capacity have to be gender-specific? Can’t people be looked at as individuals? There is more to a person, after all, than their sex, I think.

  4. peterrock12 Says:

    Come on guys, of course this is satire! You don’t think I actually believe that all men will eventually become reduced to sex slaves for all women, do you? I guess I am no Jonathan Swift! Focus on the last two paragraphs and you will see my true/main purpose for this essay. If anyone should be offended, it should be men. I was inspired to write this because in my observation, a significant portion of the male half of our species has been increasingly shirking their responsibilities as spouses/partners, as fathers, and even as human beings. This essay is really a call for them to stand up and be real men. I do think that the female characters from the movies mentioned in the essay are unrealistic portrayals of women, and taken to an extreme can have devastating consequences on both male and female understandings of each other. Think about the boy who watches the female heroine beat the tarp of six men at the same time; will the man he turns into think twice about beating up a woman who threatens his pride? Or the teenager who sneaks up at night and “watches” Sex and the City and determines that it is common for women to just want to release their sexual tension the same way men like to, so he is unconcerned about his date’s feelings and any “consequences” she might have after hooking up with her. Go to any college campus and see the troubling results of the “hook up” culture. These girls think they’re having fun at first, but the fun doesn’t last too long unless they numb the pain by getting wasted every weekend. The fact is women and men are wired differently in the brain/soul. We are as different mentally as we are physically. Now, that is not saying that men and women do not have the same capacity for intelligence! With the statement Steph referred to, I was mocking the ridiculous assumption that men had for years that because we are (in average) physically stronger, and were typically the hunters and providers as a result, that means we were smarter. I agree that men and women have the same intellectual capacity, and as such should be given equal rights, equal opportunity, equal pay, and should only be judged on the merit of their individual skills, talents and abilities. I believe that men and women are different, not unequal. Ideally our differences should complement each other. In other words, both have the same value and both have important things to bring to the table and both should respect what the other has to offer. A marriage should be a partnership. I have no problem sharing the dishes, ironing or anything else with a woman (and I love to cook!). I have to do it all myself now anyway! It is between the man and woman in the relationship to decide how they want split up the duties of life and marriage and parenthood if they decide to take it that far. And speaking of parenthood, I believe very strongly that the best possible situation for a son or a daughter is to be raised by a mother and a father in a healthy relationship. Both genders need both genders for a smooth transition into adulthood. Some women are choosing to go it alone because their men are such screw ups, but I can tell you from first hand experience that being a single parent is HARD! Statistics show that the majority of kids raised in broken homes underperform their counterparts in almost every way. Most of the time (but not all) it’s the man who flakes out and skips out on his woman and kids. Most of these kids grow up to be emotionally damaged and disconnected with a greater potential to do the same thing to their kids and the cycle just repeats itself, but like ripples in a pond the influences grows wider and wider, and like a cancer it spreads through our society. The truth is I cannot really comment on the female experience, because I’m a man, but these males do not deserve to hold the title of “man.” They are at best, adolescent boys, at worst animals without reason or conscience being led by their groins. As a teacher, it breaks my heart to see so many boys heading down that loser path and to see so many girls lower their standards and end up teenage mothers or with multiple abortions before they graduate or drop out of high school because they think that’s all that men have to offer. Because no taught them how to respect, love and honor others, let alone themselves. It is simply overwhelming. That’s what really has me all riled up.

  5. peterrock12 Says:

    ‎”The two most ridiculous errors about men and women are unisexism and male chauvinism. The unisex feminist says that women and men are not different in value, therefore they’re not different in nature. The male chauvinist says that men and women are different in nature, therefore they’re different in value.” -Peter Kreeft

  6. Steph Says:

    Well, phew! I mean, I kinda felt like this was satire but the transition was really unclear and got lost in translation so I thought “Maybe I don’t know Pete as well as I thought. Hmmm…” So I had to ask. Sorry for doubting you. I totally understand the irony of the situation you describe. Thanks for clearing that up!

  7. Steph Says:

    Let me qualify my last statement, the transition was unclear to ME and lost in translation for ME. That’s all.

  8. Em Says:

    Well, it was pretty unclear for me, too, Steph, so I’m glad you brought it up.

  9. Jessica Says:

    yeah, it was unclear to me too–glad you got to explain yourself, Pete:)

  10. peterrock12 Says:

    Well, this is my first real attempt at satire, so I hope and pray that only the right people get offended by this, and that they are moved to make a change afterwords. Sorry for the confusion everyone!

  11. Chester Says:

    I wasn’t offended in the least. Right On, Pete! Tell it like it is! But that rant at the end has gotta go. I don’t feel like getting off the couch and getting my own beer, that’s what my woman is for!
    Peace – Chester


  12. I find myself coming back to your web-site only because you have lots of awesome insights and also you happen to be at this a while, which is very impressive and tells me you know your stuff.

    • peterrock12 Says:

      Thanks! Hopefully anything that is true wisdom gets out more than anything that is my foolishness. It’s all by God’s grace!


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