August 27, 2011

The spark has dimmed, maybe even gone out completely. I can still see it in others, and I feel, I absorb it into myself. But it is only a momentary light. Just a reflection of someone else’s joy. I used to glow. There used to be a fire raging deep within me. Now my fuel has burnt out. My muse is silent. She sleeps. She sighs. She no longer brings the fuel; she no longer makes the flint crack over oil saturated wood. Not the oil of gladness, nor the oil of sadness. I am numb. My ears are deaf; I can see but all paths look the same. All paths mock me with the same dull gray rain. I want to believe; I ask for help in my unbelief in the rainbow, even in the storm that brings light spectacular and belly roar direction, but I am soaked through wet. cold. gray. numb.

Holy Spirit, bring me new life…

Peter L Richardson
6/26/11

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4 Responses to “”

  1. Pat Says:

    peterock12, we have all been in the black pit of despair at some point in our lives lived on this corrupted earth. But hope prevails in the small glimmer of eternal light just out of our reach. But reach for it anyway….eventually you will grasp it and holding on you will climb out of that darkness back into the light where you possess gifts to share with others and to brighten your own life. The light is eternal – God is eternal and if we desire Him, He will never leave us. Praying for you.

  2. Victor Says:

    Cursed, but the same time blessed is the only child of Hatred black and Glorious white, the Grey. As it represents the wisest balance and the balanced wisdom, it was rightly chosen from the rageful Ares, the god of war and the heavenly borne Aphrodite, as the color of the veil in which they dressed their only child when borne. And it was Harmony the name of that child….

    Not always she was glad, not always she was sad, but rightful she was and wise; She kept and keeps the universe in order. Otherwise. . .

    Wealth and joy gives to some, destruction to others and holy flame in the heart to those who feel sadness..

    But Harmony, the restless grey goddess whatever she gives is taking back, and gives it to some others…

    Men who used to glow should be rest and envy not their brothers, who now enjoy their turn in happiness and gladness…

    The holy balance all should keep and “rain” should not fear. Is goddess Harmony’s the will; the grey veil that she wears everyone once should wear……

  3. Chester Says:

    Man, I know EXACTLY how you feel. But don’t worry, everything is a season. Some seasons are long and seem never-ending, but there is a season for everything (Ecc 3, I think).

    “I pick up my guitar and play
    Just like yesterday
    Then I get on my knees and pray.”
    – Pete Townsend


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